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  • Writer's pictureThe Useless Robot

Punch Meets Pinocchio


Several years ago when I was researching old tales I read Pinocchio and was drawn to the character. Although he was often foolish, I couldn't help but feel sorry for him as, due to his naive nature, he got taken advantage of again and again. The story was a warning to children against not doing what you are told and trusting those whom you do not know, but I always felt that Pinocchio was punished perhaps more than he deserved for his actions.

At about the same time I came across Neil Gaiman's "The Tragical Comedy or Comical Tragedy of Mr. Punch" (illustrated by Dave Mckean). This reminded me of watching numerous Punch and Judy shows as a young child and being mesmerised by the 'naughty' antics of Mr Punch. It prompted me to read the original script. Reading it as an adult, the actions of Mr Punch became much more sinister than they seemed when I was a child. He truly was an evil character and took advantage of anything and anyone for his own gain.

Reading these two side by side I wanted to find out what would happen if these two character's met. I imagined it would be a match made in heaven for Mr Punch, but a match made in hell for poor Pinocchio.

Below is how, at the time, I imagine their first meeting to go. These are pages from my old sketchbook so it is rather rough and ends quite abruptly. I also have to apologise for the fact that it is written in Haiku (I had also just finished reading "Zombie Haiku" by Ryan Mecum).

The plan was always to take this much further but as this was nothing to do with my project at the time it got left at the bottom of the pile. I'm determined to work on a lot more personal projects throughout this year so I'm excited to see where this one goes (minus the Haiku!)

Punch Meets Pinnochio

(In Haiku)

Young Pinnochio,

was so lost and so alone,

until he met Punch.

"What's that on your shirt?"

"Why, this is just some pigs blood"

lied bad Mr Punch.

Together they went

off to the exciting town. But, Punch had a plan.

"Now," said Mr Punch

"those who do not have a care,

have so much more fun!"

"But boys who don't work,

grow up to be big donkeys!

Is that not true Punch?"

"Why Pinocchio,

you poor deluded young boy,

that is most untrue!"

So Punch showed the boy

all the wonders of the town.

Much fun did they have...

...until the night fell.

"What are you doing my friend?"

"Enjoying this girl!"

When Punch had finished

he said to Pinocchio,

"Grab those wooden bats..."

"...Now bash her head in!"

Pinocchio was confused,

this was surely wrong?

Not wanting to vex

he joined in with the murder

and they bashed and bashed.

When the girl was dead

they left her in her own blood

and went on their way.


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